That time of the month and searching some forms of myself.....

....................a prudent move....i came upon a video text message from not me.Actually its just not me and i figured i am not one to say that like that.What else i figured.NEVERTHELESS,.......how does one know the truth? who is more then another in that sense.I would hug whoever put that there its just not me but looks to be.I used some of my site names etc ta c where the music goes.I kinda laugh at the monty python video about the dirty knife a few months back.I was not c'ing myself clearly blah blah,I c strange things on my computer and it looks careful so i c its just a means and new mode of communicating.very very cool to speak in new unseen to most,symbols of pattern.I like that a lot.But............I can not control outside events and I am not seeking a thing.Nothing.I know that and alwayse daid it .How else would all this crap I let go of makes me who i am.also who i am.thats all.Trust is all and clarity of purpose happened to me lately.I did not think I could make myself look that way but ......one of me is rough enough for strange left field blather sometimes.I had to make myself express these feelings i never did and was surprised how ugly these matters of the heart and mind are blah blah sometimes this is real ......I was kinda blind to it.Like "roses that have the look of flowers that are looked at" .life is then beautiful.........