wrong info

regarding "apocolypse"being somewhere to dance.Must have been a transmission problem.I was looking at some of my spaces on line and I am almost sure someone highjacked it cuz there are things that outn't to be there.Being the loccus and focal point of evil deeds that I am(according to who or what is not yet clear but just in case if its someone who knows me........I'm not a massochist like I used to be and I could not spend an iota of energy on most of the people who do not like me and get any sleep.It is fairly obvious when someone is indifferent or flat out about their disinterest or dislike of another.So.....in addition to whatever else someone wishes to write about me and seriptitiously connect to me I would like to add this.I think it is good to like those who like you while liking people who clearly dislike or are oblivious to you measures my level of dislike of myself to some degree.These simple opinions apply only to me.I have nothing worthwhile to say to another online namely because I am of the impression that other than bitter middle aged wives on aol, I can never beleive anything I read nor to whom the blurb,post or communique' is someone "having fun".I suppose I could appear to know something but don't......kinda like you met someone but they didn't know they were meeting you nor ever did but you might of thought they did.Subterfuge is not an ameteur endeavor for most of us do not want to have to remember so many lies!!!!!! Actualy interestingly during war no one in a top position thought about the germans listening in at all manner of private and public hour.They thought about what mis truths or mock events they could use or talk about to convince the germans something else was happening.Human beings seem to do this on various levels which is interesting.Whats nice is it involves no paranoia.I recall a homless man who looked bearded and crusty on sunday and then cleanly coifed in a fine suit the next day.In this regard and many others men often have more flexible and durable choices than woman.At least on paper.My heart is a muscle.I couldn't say anything 4 sure about anyone at this point.Now in my case.... my heart is a muscle and after it breaks it mends.Heart break and heart attack are often confused.You should see all the acres of land I have kept in my heart and in most case always will for people I loved and cared for but felt better not knowing me as it suited them or as I began to set up boundaries in my life as to what is acceptable on the part of someone who seemed to sincerely care and those who's behaviour sent a distinctly unfreindly manner due to there character and behaviour not matching simple healthy ideas of how people treat one another.I keep a place for all manner of people I shall alwayse love but I know what I have kept in my heart for them is just garbage to them.Point is I do not beleive in true love less but I put myself through enough heartbreak to become enured to it.This is a special prize I must have won cuz i ain't the worst sinical person at all so I feel passionate and hopefull often and Other than on a different scale no human being could ever break my heart even if I gave it to them with siverware.Its still soft, it just can not be broken. eyill be back on this cuz